Our life goals are what allow us to move our lives forward with purpose and make decisions that will enrich us as people. And when you have a family, it’s important not just to set those goals for yourself, but to have a conversation with the other members of your family about your goals and dreams as a family unit.
It’s not as hard to do as you might think. Set aside some time for a family conference, bring out the whiteboard (or an alternative such as a whiteboard wall sticker) and spend a little while talking over how you want your goals to unfold together.
Thinking About Your Family Goals
Before you start planning, here are some things you should consider when setting goals together as a family:
- The more you work on your goals together as a family, the greater the feeling of collaborative achievement will be when you achieve them. And conversely, the more you’ll be able to lean on each other for love and support when some of your goals hit the inevitable bumps in the road.
- Not every member of the family has to be involved in real decision-making about some goals. Obviously, you wouldn’t expect your third grader to help you make big financial decisions. What’s important is that you talk about these decisions and make them objects of discussion so that kids will feel included in the processes of family life.
- Finally, note that family goals shouldn’t be ironclad commitments that are motivated through shame or punishment. Instead, they should be strategies for creating a more full, secure, healthy and joyful life together. Plan for a sense of joy in doing, rather than guilt or regret in not doing.
Some helpful tools for family goal-setting sessions include:
- Pens, pencils and/or markers
- Snacks and beverages
- One device for looking things up (more may cause distractions)
- Erasable writing surface such as a whiteboard wall sticker or dry erase calendar wall decal
Next, we’ll talk about some sample goals that many families find useful to set. Some of these goals are appropriate for kids, others for adults and others for any age.
- Mental and Physical Health Goals
Every other type of goal is easier to achieve when you and your family are in good mental and physical health. That’s why it’s important to establish these goals as part of your family plans.
- Daily servings of healthy foods like fruits and vegetables to add to your diet
- Daily minutes of meditation or breathing exercises
- Seeing a therapist (individually or as a family) a certain number of times per month
- Getting a certain number of exercise minutes in per day
- Reducing added sugars and other detrimental foods by a certain amount
- Achievement Goals
Whether it’s school for the kids or careers for the grown-ups, everyone should set goals for pushing themselves personally, professionally and academically. By setting achievement goals, every family member can help direct themselves more powerfully toward their dreams and ambitions.
- Minutes per day spent working on homework or extracurricular projects
- Grade point averages to achieve on schoolwork
- Finishing personal projects and presenting them at a hobbyist event (or just to the family)
- Completing a certain renovation on the family home or moving into a new space
- Laying the groundwork for asking for a raise by a certain date
- Quality Time Goals
Quality time with the family is one of those things that’s all too easy to let slip away when you don’t plan it. So make a plan and set some goals!
- Eating dinner as a family a certain number of times per week
- Watching a movie together at least one night per week
- Doing specific interest activities together a certain number of times per month
- Learning to cook a number of new recipes together
- A certain number of date nights with a spouse or partner, and what kids will do in the meantime
Source: Annette Shaff/Shutterstock
- Screen Time Goals
Experts are increasingly warning against unlimited screen time for children. So, when you sit down to chart your goals, it’s a really good idea to think about how much screen time you’ll budget, as well as what kind of media your kids will be consuming.
- Minutes of screen time per day and/or per device
- Areas of the house in which devices are allowed to be used
- How many minutes of screen time must be for an educational purpose
- Types of content allowed for screen time
- Number of books to read in a year or per month
- Social and Activity Goals
Set some goals for how you and your kids want to get involved in your community and in extracurricular activities. It’s easy to get caught up in the mini-universe of the nuclear family, but it’s crucial for both kids and adults to branch out and explore the wider world.
A certain amount of volunteer hours per month or per year
- Specific community projects to volunteer on together
- A certain number of playdates or social calls per month with family and friends
- Sending kids to summer camp or other fun and educational summer activities
- Finding one or more political or social causes to become involved in together
- Financial Goals
Most people think of financial goals as being for adults, but it’s never too early for children to learn the basics of saving, investing and building for the future. The more these topics are discussed openly, the more kids can become comfortable with them.
- Saving or investing a certain percentage of income
- Creating and sticking to a family budget
- Establishing or contributing to a college savings fund
- Donating a certain portion of income to a local charity or grassroots organization of choice
Source: Monkey Business Images/Shutterstock
In the end, remember that your goals and plans are guidelines, not necessarily a blueprint that has to be followed exactly. By making decisions from a place of love and togetherness, your goals are likely to be positive and productive ones.
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